In this video, Jordan Peterson describes the process of learning to tell the truth and become a stronger person.
He begins by describing an experience of what felt like a split developing in his psyche.
One part of him going on with his normal business. Communicating with people in his usual manner. Saying things to win arguments, to sound good, to impress people.
Then there was a 2nd part of his psyche. When Jordan would be speaking, this 2nd part would chime in by saying “you don’t actually believe that, that isn’t your idea, you don’t really know what you’re talking about, that isn’t true”.
This is an interesting position to be put in. To have everything you are saying be questioned by some part of you that wasn’t known to exist. And also, to question- which one do I listen to?
Jordan played along and assumed the critic was the real “me” and to align his words and actions with this critic as best as possible.
To do this- he had to stop saying 95% of what he would usually say. Quite shocking to realize that 95% of himself was basically a BS artist.
Jordan goes on to say that if that 95% of you is weak, then maybe exactly what you want to happen is to let this part go and be left with the 5% which is strong.
“And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually”.
Just exactly what are my motives? I would have to agree with Jordan. Despite all appearances, I think I have to work very hard at being a decent person.
I never have to look very far to find the self-seeking motive in most things I do or say. My first thought is usually not something I would want the world to know.
They usually border on being very critical of other people. Sometimes I feel myself being so envious of others that I rejoice when things go haywire. Other times I think people are so pathetic they should just stay inside their homes.
Fortunately, Jordan recognizes how all people have this capacity for malevolence to some degree.
Now, after having seen this part of me- what do I do with it? The fastest way is to tell the truth.
Here are some examples:
Let’s say I find myself being very envious of others and one of my friends tells me good news. Rather than saying, “OMG I am so happy for you” I began to say “Wow, I know I should be happy for you, but I can’t help but feel a sense of envy and wish that was me instead”
Let’s say I find myself thinking I am better than other people. When someone asks me How I am doing, rather than saying “Good, how are you”? I can say (in a comical manner) “I am feeling wonderfully superior today, thank you for asking”.
There is real utility in becoming more aware of this capacity for malevolence. More importantly, how I also deny it and pretend it does not exist.
Jordan describes it as a virtue, the diagnosis of an illness. It is not self-destructive, coming to terms with this gives the opportunity to do something about it. This is a process of “separating the wheat from the chaff”.
Or in other words, allowing the 95% of me that is dead wood to burn off, so that the 5% of me that is strong and courageous to live.