In this video Jordan Peterson answers the question of how to develop your personality and potential.
Jordan Peterson is a man who wears many hats. In my (expert) opinion, he is one of the most qualified people to answer this question.
Jordan Peterson is a clinical psychologist, professor, and best-selling author. His best-selling book, 12 rules for life, has sold more than 5 million copies.
In 1999, JP published Maps of Meaning. This book argued that myths provide the key to understanding the human psyche and shared culture.
JP encompasses a wide array of expertise. He is a brilliant thinker. His teachings tend to incorporate aspects of psychoanalysis, mythology, psychology, and cognitive science.
This video is a great example.
As Jordan sets out to answer the question “how to know yourself”, he first responds that the first step in coming to know yourself is recognizing that you don’t.
That is not easy to understand- you think you know yourself, and that it is tough to get low enough to recognize just how ignorant you are about yourself.
But then you remember you’re not very disciplined, full of flaws, can’t control yourself, etc.
From this shocking revelation comes an upside- that if you are ignorant about who you are, then you are also ignorant about who you can be.
This should come as a pleasant surprise to anyone who can’t stand themselves.
So how do I come to know myself?
“You watch yourself like you’re watching a stranger. You watch what you say, and you listen”.
Start to become aware of all the ways you lay out a lie for people.
In what way’s do I say things I don’t mean? Maybe in order to avoid confrontation or to please others. How am I deceiving myself and others? In what ways do I adopt a personality to ‘fit in’ or to be liked?
An interesting part of the video is when JP lays out a series of questions for the viewer to answer of themselves.
What are my dark fantasies? What is it that I am willing to do? What am I interested in? What do I procrastinate about and why? What do I think is good? What do I congratulate myself for accomplishing? What do I berate myself for failing to implement?
JP goes on to say how these are all incredibly complicated questions that you don’t know the answers to.
“When you start to realize how much of what you’ve constructed of yourself is based on deception and lies, that is a horrifying realization”.
Fortunately, there is some real utility in that realization. From that horrifying realization can come the ambition to incorporate that dangerousness into a higher order personality.
This is the first way to discover your potential. In a way, of being absolutely terrified of the alternative.
I remember a dark time in my life, someone asked me where I saw myself in 5 years.
I knew I wasn’t on an upward trajectory and did not have much motivation to do anything about my current situation.
I replied “basically in the same place I am now. Not much will change”.
His response was that things don’t tend to stay the same. They get incrementally worse or better.
When the question arose again, Where do I see myself in 5 years- I became terrified at what I saw 5, 10, 20 years into my future. There came the motivation.
The 2nd way to discover your potential is to challenge yourself.
“To put yourself together, the first steps towards that is to allow yourself to be a fool”.
There will be a necessary loss of ego in taking this first step, but this is exactly what is preventing movement forward.
Being too proud of who you think you are to notice what you’re like so that you can change properly.
Jordan lays out 2 ways to discover your potential.
The first is to begin to know yourself.
You begin to know yourself by watching yourself and paying attention. Very closely. Without allowing what is wanted to interfere with what is observed.
The 2nd way is to challenge yourself- continually.
What small steps can I take today to start aiming upward in life? How far past yesterday can I push myself? And to continually experiment with expanding my competence, and also my ability to increase that competence.
“The more that’s guided by the highest of all possible visions… and the more it’s accompanied by truth in speech and action, the more you will develop your potential.”